Processing Emotions

I think today is the first day I started processing any emotions, these last few days I have been so excited and just so focused on seeing the kids that I couldn't even acknowledge the craziness going on inside me. Seeing how much they have grown and how much I have missed them made my heart ache inside me. I didn't want to open up the wound that has been trying to heal these last 10 1/2 months I've been away. I have felt so torn by my passion for these kids and my calling to be back in the states. I feel like I am sitting in limbo, heart torn in two, afraid to move forward and afraid to go back. I wish I could explain it better than that.... I wish I could explain how half hearted I have felt about life recently. God planted this seed inside me and I watched it grow, felt the growing pains and enjoyed the fruits of love and relationship. And then with one swoop I felt cut from the branch laying beside the tree watching it grow without me. 


Today as I shared in conversations with the kids and reminisced about all we have shared I slowly felt that passion, that wound open up. And then like salt on that wound I discovered the stories of neglect, manipulation and emotional anguish inflicted by people in these kids lives who are suppose to care about them. Thank God though that although the realities of their lives pierced my heart there was joy in seeing the continuous chain of volunteers and staff that are here pouring out each day, loving these kids in the ways they deserved to be loved. I found comfort in my pain that even though I cannot be here daily, there are those who are, carrying on the legacy of love and sharing hope, spurring the kids on to better and brighter futures. 


I won't lie that it is hard to accept that someone else is loving on my kids, and I know that is selfish and ridiculous really to consider them mine, because they always were and always are going to be God's kids. I just struggle with what my part is now; how can I love these kids and still live my life back in the states? 

1st day back at the orphanage!

Here Goes.....

So much has been going through my mind as I am preparing for this next adventure in Romania. Joy floods my heart as I think of seeing the kids I have missed so dearly this year. It has been a difficult 11 months, with ups and downs. And in the midst of it all, the only relationship that never fails me is the one I share with God. Even in my imperfection, making mistakes constantly, His love abounds. I can't explain it in words, I can only tell you regardless of my failures, I feel it in my bones, in my soul, He is there with me.
I do not necessarily believe I am an example to anyone, I am simply trying to live a life composed of faith, hope and love; and to share it with all those I come in contact with. I often fail, but I continue to try and rise after every fall with renewed faith and passion. With the receiving of grace I press on with the ultimate goal of love always in everything.
 I pray this adventure is no different!


I am excited to celebrate at all people who helped me get this far, and I was even blessed with extra to buy supplies..... check it out

The receipt..... wow!

Goodies for Summer Camps, the staff & in-coming teams!

The Supplies : 3 bags!

My stuff : 1 bag : )

----->>>> Keep an eye out for video blogs while I am in Romania! 

Thank you so much for your time, encouragement and support! 

With Love,

Krista

5 days and I am Wow'd!

It is no question that I am meant to go to Romania this summer; God has provided abundantly and in excess! 


Tomorrow I get to begin the task of supply shopping for Romania. A large donation was made, giving me the ability to fulfill some needs of the kids, staff and teams in Romania. 


The last couple weeks have been a roller-coaster of events, stress and emotions.... but God has met me every step of the way.  I have been blessed with friends, encouragement and financial support. I am Wow'd by how abundantly and quickly God has provided. 


5 more days and it hardly feels real! I don't think it will hit me until Thursday morning when I am at the airport. 


Thanks everyone for your loving, caring, passionate support! 




----->>>> Keep an eye out for my video blogs when I am in Romania! 

In Awe!

I am beyond amazed and in Awe! I found out today I am only $329 dollars from my goal for Romania! I have been so blessed. I was so excited when I found out... I wasn't sure if I wanted to dance or cry! 


So many people have come along side me and supported me, and 3 months ago when I started fundraising I thought there was no way I could raise all this money is such a short period of time. And God surprised me as usual. In only 25 days I will see my kids and friends in Romania I love so much, and that brings tears of joy to my eyes. 


Thank you so much to all those who have supported me in so many ways. Thank you for helping me show these kids I love that I have not forgotten about them. Thank you for helping me keep a promise to see them again. For kids with so many broken promises in their lives I am so thankful I can keep my promises to them. I am so thankful I can show them they are important enough to come back.  


If I could only describe the emotional roller-coaster I have been on since my arrival home, if I could only describe the longing that has never left my heart to go back! God changed my life and my world when I went to Romania and I am excited (and a bit nervous) to see what He does this time. 


Thank you from the deepest parts of my heart for all of your support. I have felt so loved and so special that so many people care enough about me and these kids to give of themselves and their means to get me back. 


I dream about hugging the kids, talking with them and being with them in Romania! And tonight I go to sleep with the comfort I am really going, I am really going to see my kids again, and that brings me more joy than I could every describe!

https://bridgewaychristianchurch.wufoo.com/forms/romania-2012-online-giving/

Half-Way There!

I can't believe that in 43 days I will hopefully be on a plane to Romania! Soon after that wrapping my arms around the precious children who captured my heart! It looks like I am about half way to my financial goal of getting there! Praise God! What a blessing it will be to show the kids that my love for them has not been forgotten, that they are important enough for me to come back. I don't want to be another broken promise or reflection of false love in their lives. I want them to see that love crosses all borders and boundaries; it transcends all space and time, from heaven to humanity.


As this time quickly approaches I am being bombarded my financial burdens, stress and life changes, and things feel impossible. Then I am reminded about all the ways I have been richly blessed and that God has never failed me. I don't expect everyone to understand this call and passion in my life. The only way I can explain it, it's like a gravitational pull in my heart that can't be denied. 


Thank you to all of those who have so graciously given, prayed and encouraged me! I am still in some need of help and if you feel compelled or able it would be a true blessing to me. And I promise to keep you updated every step of the way.  
https://bridgewaychristianchurch.wufoo.com/forms/romania-2012-online-giving/

Awaiting in faith,
Krista

Romania Return Update

I started to feel that rush of panic and excitement today as I realized my trip to Romania is about 71 days away..... or at least I hope. I've got about $2,700 still to raise. In some ways it feels like I left Romania a couple months ago, and in other ways I feel like it has been so long since I saw my kids. I received an e-mail today from a friend who is filming there and he included some pictures, seeing the kids faces again made me long that much more to get there! I wish I could describe in words how torn my heart is.... I feel like half of it is in Romania, and half here in the states. 9 months later and my pictures and thoughts of them still brings me to tears.

This trip is more than just going to see the kids though, this is about working with them. Summer teams are needed to run the camps and summer activities. I am excited to work and pour into the kids' lives again.

Someone asked me the other day... “Why do you want to go back, and why so quickly?” My thought was, not quickly enough, I would have gone sooner had I had the funds. Granted my life is still not on track or in some kind of perfect condition.... and I already want to go back. Not only does my heart and passion for Romania call me back, it's the commitment to the kids. These beautiful children I have grown to love and call my own are kids who have spend a lifetime being rejected, abandoned and forgotten. I never want them to feel that with me. I want them to know Romania was not just a small part of my life, it was a part the is forever etched into my heart. My goal is to go back to Romania every year I can. I hope that once I finish school and begin my career I can spend my summers serving every year.

I do need some help to get there and have some exciting fund-raising events to share:

Friday May 4^th Mini Photo Session @ Old Folsom Power House - 3pm-6pm

Call: Shannon Squires, #775.722.6659 - $50 for a 30 mini photo session, includes a disk with 10 images. (check her work out on Facebook: (https://www.facebook.com/pages/Shannon-Squires-Photography)

Saturday May 26^th – Game Night at my place.... Poker buy-in and prizes! Details to follow.

June 2^nd – Yard Sale. Accepting donations or come a find some good deals.

June 9^th – Mini Photo Session (Location & times to follow)

$50 for a 30 mini session, includes a disk with 10 images.

June 16^th – Car Wash @ my place.

*If you are interested in any of these fund-raisers let me know! Check out my blog as well for updates and a link to donate online... remember it's a tax deductible donation. Even if you just give up two coffee's in my honor & give $10 it would be appreciated more than you know!

Contact me anytime: E-mail: writekrista@hotmail.com

Or give at: https://bridgewaychristianchurch.wufoo.com/forms/romania-2012-online-giving/