Video blogging, a do or don't?

I can't believe it has been a month in a half since I updated this! So sorry I am behind, so much has happened these last two months. December was a month full of parties and celebrations for Christmas. It was also a month filled with challenges, heaters not working, electricity out, water shut off due to ice and weather. There was even a day of two ministry was changed, postponed or even cancelled due to weather issues. It was a crazy month, but it was also a memorable month filled with joy, laughter and love. There was so much joy in knowing our kids had a sense of family through us. We attended every program or Christmas special, we stood with pride as we watched out kids shine. I felt blessed to be a part of such a special time with our kids. Even those late night preparing or sewing that last star on the dance costume I felt all the joys I can only imagine a mother feels.

They say pictures are worth a thousand words, so I have included several pictures from our December adventures!

I also was able to go home for Christmas this year and was blessed by friends and family. I couldn't have asked for a better time at home. Even with my luggage missing almost 10 days, and traveling to three different states with delays along the way, I was overwhelmed with joy, comfort and love. I ate at all the place I missed, had sushi twice, got a new hair-cut, got spoiled with gifts and special brunches and parties.... I felt a sense of comfort and love that reminded me I am not forgotten back home.

With a Thankful Heart

Thanksgiving day arrived, and I head the sounds of mummers in our dinning room, laughing and talking and visiting going on right down the stairs. I entered the dinning room to see the 60 people gathered, familiar faces, friends, new and old, family and I felt the overflowing of thankfulness in my heart. Over 40 of our kids arrived to celebrate with us. As I looked around I saw kids I met my first summer here in Romania, seven years ago; a few of them married now with babies, starting their own families. Everyone seemed so happy and joyful. I looked around and saw all the people I have been honored to serve with this last year and felt blessed. Conversations, hugs and laughter going on all around me; old faces, new faces and baby faces. As we shared what we were thankful for not one of our kids got up without mentioning how thankful they are for the family they have found through H2H. It gave me misty eyes thinking that I got to be a part of making these kids feel loved, welcomed and part of a family. And being there with the kids it felt more like family than I ever imagined. Even as we prepared the house it was so beautiful, but nothing was better than that moment I looked around and realize just how immeasurably blessed I am! Thanks be to God that I was able to spend another year here in Romania loving on these wonderful kids and enjoying the fellowship and friendships I've built here. Nothing could make sacrificing the holidays with my biological family more worth it than to spend it with my spiritual family!

Our newest member of the H2H family, little Ruthie!

I made pumpkin cheesecake with orange zest, yummy!

Some of the kids I met seven years ago, they aren't kids anymore!

And as I reflect on Thanksgiving now, I think most of all besides the love of my Father above, I am so honored, blessed and thankful for the friendships, new and old, the family, biological and spiritual that fill my heart with a love and gives me strength, desire and passion to live every day to the fullest.

Everyday Stuff

I can harly believe it has been a month since my last post, time is flying by. And I was thinking I don't have anything really big to blog about, and then I realized that every day is worthy of writing about. I think of the hugs I recieve as the kids running into my arms. I think about my one night a week with our high school girls, doing each others hair, helping them with their homework and being like a sister to them. I think about hearing "mommy" yelled at the halls of the orphanage and knowing that means me. I think about watching the kids race to class when they know we have art. I think about the kids counting down the days until their next art class, telling me, you're coming tomorrow at 3 o'clock. I think about youth group on Thursday nights singing with the kids, worshiping a God that is becoming more and more real in their lives. I think about the relationships that I have developed, my special kids who cling to me, or wrap their arms around me, smoothering my cheeks with kisses. Sometimes I get lost in trying to come up with a big story or revelation in my life to write about and lose sight that even the little things are important. I wake up every day thanking God for getting me here to this place, at this time. I honestly cherish and relish every moment and memory with the kids here. And if I could name each one of them, describe each smile and personality I am confident you would fall in love with them all too. Life is about the day to day and the more I allow my future to lay in the hands of God the more I can keep my focus on the day to day and live in the moment to moment without looking ahead and losing sight of what's right in front of me.

I hope we all have those moments in our day, when just stop and soak in the moment. Today my moment (one of many) was when I saw one of our littlest girls in the midst of 15 rowdy kids from across the room, I said her name and when she saw me past all the motion going on around her she shot me a big grin and headed my direction, arms spread out in anticipation of the hug she knew and expected. And she wrapped her arms around my neck and I scooped her up, we exchanged greetings and effections as if we were all that existed at that moment. It was a beautiful moment in a day filled with small moments and memories I cherish.

Rays of Light

God never ceases to amaze me; He never stops showing me little rays of His bright light. It seems when a reminder is needed, that extra piercing to the heart God always comes through. Today I sat across from a young boy at the team house who is only 15, his mother who was beside me was sharing his story. This young boy was adopted from Romanian ten years ago, right before adoptions were closed. The story of how this boy made it to a loving family in the states is one of miracles. What I find even more amazing is who this boy has become. He has spent time trying to figure out what God has planned for him and why he is where he is and who he is? (Aren't we all trying to figure that out?) This young man came to the conclusion that he was should help the kids who had not been adopted from Romania. So now, not only has he raised hundreds of dollars to come to Romania, he has also raised thousands more to buy shoes for all of the kids at the orphanages we work at. Not only has he done this, but through this experience he has spoken out to others, shared his deepest fears and struggles. He has also challenged hundreds of teenagers to seek their role in changing the world and sharing Christ's love. And as his story is fresh in my mind today I saw a video of a woman who was born against all odds. This woman was suppose to be delivered dead through a saline abortion, but instead she is alive and living and speaking out for God. She said she is willing to be hated to speak out for God. I thought about all the walks of life many of us come through, all the times God interceded even when we didn't realize it. That the all knowing, great God ordains every meeting, every challenge, every friendship, every conversation, every situation for us to see His grace and glory.

There are times it seems God's light shines so brightly and times it seems so dull, but it is always there, we just have to choose how much we see. And as God revealed to me His beautiful light through these two lives I thought to myself, am I willing to be hated? Am I willing to really stand up in what I believe in? Am I walking every day in a way that glorifies my God? Am I speaking, acting, loving and trusting as if my beliefs are alive and true every day? When I feel like I can't give anymore, do I give more? When I am tried and frustrated, do I still speak with kindness? And most of all, do I filter what I say or how much I talk about The God who loves me because I am afraid of what others might think?

God provided these two lives as a reminder, these two rays of light that He is all around me. I can see Him around me and working in me and pray others can see Him through me too, even with all my fleshly faults.

His kids

I can't believe it is October already? Where has the time gone! So many changes this last month, and I am not just talking about the weather. I am moved into my apartment where I will primarily be this year, which I am very happy about. Moving around so much last year had it's wearing nature. I have spent most of the last few weeks planning, planning, planning. Then I went to the translating, translating, translating phase. I spent more time on my computer the last few weeks than I did all summer. I am very excited about Art and all the other activities we have planned for this year. I received my schedule and will be working all afternoons and many late evenings..... pray God will give me stamina. Mornings will be reserved for my physical, mental and spiritual health.... oh, and lesson planning and translating of course! It will be a busy year, but I am excited to see what God has in store.

One thing that has been very heavy on my heart this week is a very special girl and her sister. As most of you know this last year a young girl named Ana stole my heart, her and her sister Flori lit up my heart every time I saw them. Whenever I was at the orphanage Ana was usually attached to my hip and Flori was not far behind. Ana was my special little monkey, as I like to call her. She was the sunshine in my day. She is from a gypsy family and didn't speak hardly any romanian, she also had some learning disabilities, but she had made much progress this last year. She couldn't say my name and usually called me "Ta". Her face said it all most days when she'd grin as I scooped her up into my arms. In an attempt to re-unite families the new director at the orphanage located most of the kids families and offered for them to spend some time at home during the summer months, while school was out. So, one day I arrived at the orphanage to find Ana and Flori had gone with their parents to visit, but were coming back in fall. I missed them dearly, but kept thinking, I can't wait for Ana and Flori to come back. I'm sure the staff got tired of me saying, I miss my little monkey. Once summer was ending many of the kids who were united with their families began to come back. Every time we were at the orphanage I would look, hope and pray the girls would be back too. As kids ran and hugged me, I was overwhelmed with excitement to see all of our kids, but my heart still urned for little Ana and Flori to arrive back. Then one day one of the kids pulled me aside, he's about 14 years old and said I need to talk to you. He began to tell me that Ana and Flori were not coming back (kids are very observant and the kids know the bond I have with little Ana). I thanked him for telling me and I thought maybe he's misinformed? Then rumors from kids and staff at the orphanage started flooding my way, several times I wanted to cry right then and there at the thought of never seeing my little Ana or Flori ever again. Rumors that their mother took them out of the country, rumors the family was going to marry off 14 year old Flori started.... I have no idea what the real story is or where these beautiful girls are. I pray everyday that they are safe and that God would bring them back. From my understanding they are legally suppose to be brought back to the orphanage, at least for schooling? My heart aches and fears for them, and of course I selfishly desire to see them again. I know I have to trust they are in God's hands and He is caring for them, but I figure more prayers couldn't hurt, so please pray for them! Pray for their safety. Pray for my heart as it sinks every time I arrive to the orphanage and don't see their smiling faces. Pray for peace in my heart.
I know it is part of the ministry our hearts breaking over and over again, but it never gets any easier.

School's Starting

Ministry is starting again, vacations are over and kids are going back to school. This is an exciting time because we get to plan and get pumped up for the new year. I am especially excited because I received my assignment for the year and am so excited; I will be the head Art teacher for our two orphanage locations. I will also be the assistant dance teach and co-youth leader and character developer. I have been putting together the curriculum for my art class.... and this has been fun, but at the same time a challenge for someone who has never had the responsibility to instruct a class. I have had lots of experience co-teaching or assisting, but actually leading a class, wow! I couldn't have asked for a better class to teach...... but I am up for the challenge.

We also have prepared classroom school packs with supplies for the teachers and children at the orphanages and will be delivering them all this week. There were a few kids that did go to relatives over the summer (the new director at the main orphanage we work at has been trying to connect the kids with family). I am so excited to see some of the kids return and see how they have grown over the summer. And as silly as it sounds I am ready for a schedule in my life..... the summer was crazy and overwhelming, so I am excited to have a schedule and know when I will be with the kids.

During these last few weeks we have also been spending a lot of time with our older kids, youth. These are the kids who have graduated from our transition programs and are living in the city, (some with our assistance). It has been a great time of building relationships and discipleship. I have really enjoyed this time. I visited one of our girls at her job, Starbucks (oh the hardships of ministry, ha,ha!) ... afterward some of the other girls met us and we had dinner. We also have been playing volleyball in the park every Sunday after church. And then just last night we invited all of our girls over to one of the apartments and we had chili and cornbread and visited, what a great time of bonding with our girls and staff.

I have also had the pleasure of spending time at the baby hospital with our littlest ones. I have mostly been with the toddlers, we are up to 8 toddlers. As I was playing with them yesterday I realized one of our sets of twins just turned 1 year old a few days ago...... I remember when I first got here last year and they were only a few months old & now they are walking and playing! It was a bit sad thinking these precious, beautiful girls didn't get a 1st birthday; one of the sad realities I face often that breaks my heart. I kissed them and told them happy birthday, but it hardly seemed like enough.

All of our toddlers are so beautiful and so adorable, watching them play and feeling their little fingers wrapped around my hand, or seeing them reach out to me as they stumble around on their little legs reminds me how much I cherish my time with them.

Prayer requests:

As we start this year funding is low, as we are all in a time of financial struggle and I pray we find all the resources we need to have a successful year.

I pray the kids lives would be drastically changed this year, weather that means learning how to express themselves, families coming into their lives or finding joy they never had before, I pray for God's love to cover them this year like never before.

I pray for more volunteers and helpers to come on teams, for extra arms to hug, to hold and comfort our beautiful children.

I pray God would guide us in our decisions and lead us in the ways that would be most impactful in our children's lives!